Every mall has a Holiday Tree.
But THIS mall has The Tree of Blinding Radiance, a glowing lattice of LED leaves so bright it could guide ships through fog.
And guarding it — whether intentionally or by cosmic accident — were two unlikely winter-beach heroes:
Baldric
and
Hoodie Finn.
Baldric, the man with the shaved head and the expression of someone who has seen things at holiday malls — things involving return policies, stroller traffic, and cinnamon-sugar emergencies — walked with the slow, alert steps of a retired lighthouse keeper.
Wherever Baldric went, people stepped aside.
Not out of fear —
but because he radiated the energy of a man who has absolutely no time for nonsense.
Behind him followed Hoodie Finn, a teenager wrapped in a light-blue hoodie like a sea otter wrapped in kelp. Finn’s permanent expression said:
“I didn’t choose this journey. I’m just trying to survive it.”
And on this particular afternoon, Baldric and Hoodie Finn approached the glowing Holiday Tree as if responding to a silent beacon.
The LED leaves flickered.
The branches shimmered.
The mall air vibrated with something between electricity and seasonal mall stress.
Hoodie Finn whispered, voice barely audible:
“Dude… it looks alive.”
Baldric narrowed his eyes, nodding once.
“Aye.”
Hoodie Finn blinked. “Why did you say ‘aye’? You’re not a pirate.”
Baldric squinted harder at the tree.
“Winter does things to a man.”
They stood there, gazing through the dense web of white glowing branches like two explorers staring into a mystical forest portal.
Behind them, mall shoppers drifted by:
— A woman carrying three bags of scented candles
— A guy drinking bubble tea like it was the elixir of life
— Two kids arguing about whether the tree was real (it was not)
— A massage chair waiting silently for its next victim
But Baldric and Hoodie Finn didn’t move.
They were entranced.
“It’s like… the ocean,” Finn murmured.
“How?” Baldric asked.
Finn thought.
“It’s deep. It’s bright. And I’m not sure if something inside is watching me.”
Baldric nodded slowly.
Together, they took a step closer — reverent, cautious — as though the tree might whisper a holiday prophecy only they could hear.
And in that moment, between the glow of a thousand LED leaves and the hum of a thousand mall footsteps…
Baldric said the most sacred winter-beach phrase of all:
“Come on, kid. Let’s find pretzels.”
And just like that, the spell broke.
The tree shimmered one last time behind them
as Baldric & Hoodie Finn walked on.